The thin line between Being Firm & Being Demanding (in parenting)

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The thin line between Being Firm & Being Demanding (in parenting)

As known out wide in open, parenting can be counted as one of the most difficult jobs which do not pay at all. People often get confused between the concept of having children and parenting, these aren’t the same concepts. Parenting comes into the picture after having kids and it’s a bigger responsibility than what is being portrayed over years. Being a good parent involves both hard and soft decisions which help kids to identify what is right and what Is wrong. It’s simple, whatever kids decide parents are meant to support them.

Parents can be demanding, not in a materialistic context, but parenting styles. There is no such thing as a perfect parent because parenting can vary according to circumstantial instances, every parent tries their best to offer the most to their children. Meanwhile, setting limits can be a hard task to accomplish to discipline children, yet not impossible. But what point it is when parents have the urge to understand as to there is an invisible line that should be drawn between being firm and being demanding? Being firm and demanding are different aspects of parenting.

Being firm in parenting is setting clear and reasonable limits with kindness whereas being demanding in parenting could be forcing children to reach perfection. The top CBSE schools of Pune have researched about this prospect and have come up with the conclusion as to being demanding while parenting can affect mental health and overall, the behavior of children. Let’s check different aspects as to why is it important to draw a line between being firm and being demanding in parenting: –

Supportiveness: Support plays an important role in a child’s life, especially from their parents. Support counts all emotional, mental as well as physical aspects of it. To help children nourish completely and lead a happy life. From time to time praises, appreciating their achievements and work can be an effective way to help children in achieving better. While parenting, there can be instances that demand being authoritative but that does not implement to be a demanding parent, instead of handling these kinds of situations with more kindness and sense of responsibility. Being a supportive parent can offer a great deal of encouragement to children and develop interests and personal characteristics. Handling temper & tantrums is also one of them.
Interactions: Communication plays an important role in the lives of children as it helps them to manage any and every sort of difference they may face in their lives. Communication builds a bridge between parents and children making it a way of showing affection. Here, a common misunderstanding would be giving beyond limit freedom to children in order to communicate. Well, communication has to have rules of privacy for both parents and children whereas, at the same time, it should have enough level of comfort for children to talk about any sort of problems. Here, being a demanding parent might not help as it can restrict children from opening up and leading to the development of shyness, anxiety, and mental restrictiveness. Moreover, being a firm parent can be of good help as it will allow to improve communication gaps and help children to talk about themselves.
Hear: Communication has to be a two-way method. A child requires constant assurances for their decisions and achievements, which only parents can provide with love and affection. Instead of having a bossy atmosphere around children, parents can implement ground rules of listening sessions for their children. In such sessions, parents can give time to their children and listen to them about their day or if anything interesting happened in their lives. Such sessions or hours can be good activities to build a bond between parents and children. Being a demanding parent may ignore the hearing aspect of children’s lives instead being a firm parent will offer more solutions to their children building a stronger relationship.
Regulate: Exploring different aspects about children, can help understand their behavior and help to regulate day-to-day responsibilities. Regulation in parenting refers to interaction via modes of setting appropriate limits, discipline, and supervision. Parenting styles can be affected by the behavioral style of the child, increasing the importance of regulation. Every child is different and requires different sets of parenting styles. Being firm as a parent will provide guidance to regulate appropriate values in a child’s behavior while being a demanding parent can bring a sense of rebellion in the child. A parental approach has to be regulative when and when not around people as it can leave a major impact on children’s lives.

The evolving rules of society may bring along pressure on parents which can be imposed onto children. Being competitive can be healthy but also hazardous in perspectives of extent. A lot of pressure is added on the naïve shoulders of children considering future aspects, as being the best in this society can only be considered to be best. A parent should have the understanding about imposing high hopes on their children can be a demanding step, resulting in disappointment for children. Parents have the golden opportunity to guide their children to work for themselves and not for/or according to the other societal norms. Excessively demanding habits in parenting can result in sleep deprivation, eating disorders, excessive worrying, loss of interest in hobbies, and withdrawal from friends and family of children.

With a great deal of research and holding sessions with students and parents, the CBSE schools of Pune have proved how atmosphere can affect the mental ability of a child. It is important as to what values parents use and teach in the early stages of children’s lives as it has an impact on their growth. Any case of specific advice would be trying different styles of parenting and using a combination to improve, such as:

Uninvolved Parents – Under this style of parenting, parents can lower their responses in all sorts of matters to their children yet having a little presence and authority.
Permissive Parent – This kind of parenting can be used at the most but only if added a touch of control. Such parenting is warm and communicative but also offers a structure for their children. A more friendly way of parenting.
Authoritarian Parent – This style of parenting has more of a demanding aspect and also lowers responsiveness in children’s lives. Strict rules, expected outcomes, and structured obedience are the three prospects authoritarian parenting depends on.
Authoritative Parent – A reasonable amount of responsiveness and control is the combination that authoritative parenting provides. Such a Parenting style can have a happier not in life ahead of children as it has the appropriate discipline and allows space for negotiation.

It can differ from parent to parent, as to what can suit their child. But a definitive structure needs to be understood by parents to draw that thin line between being firm and being demanding. This line holds much more importance, due to the role it plays in parenting and can affect the growth of children. Lastly, parents know their children and can only think the best for their children, a little guidance and counseling can offer more light onto the growing graph of parenting.

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